A cop was patrolling late at night in a well-known spot. He sees a couple in a car with the interior light brightly glowing. The cop carefully approaches the car to get a closer look.
Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine. He immediately notices a young woman in the rear seat, knitting. Puzzled by this surprising situation, the cop walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window.
The young man lowers his window . "Uh, yes, officer?" The cop says: "What are you doing?"
The young man says: "Well, Officer, I'm reading a magazine." Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the cop says: "And her, what is she doing?"
The young man shrugs: "Sir, I believe she's knitting a pullover sweater."
Now, the cop is totally confused. A young couple. Alone, in a car, at night in a Lover's lane....and nothing obscene is happening!
The cop asks: "What's your age, young man?" The young man says, "I'm 22, sir." The cop asks, "And her ... what's her age?"
The young man looks at his watch and replies: "She'll be 18 in 11 minutes."
I lived in a houseboat for a while and started seeing the girl next door. Eventually, we drifted apart.
My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic. I refused. If I'm going to have sex, it is going to be on my own Accord.
A man tried to sell me a coffin today. I told him, that's the last thing I need.
The neighbourhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs. We had been his customers for 8 years. We had no idea he was a barber.
One hundred years ago everyone had a horse and only the rich had cars. Nowadays everyone has a car and only the rich have horses. Oh how the stables have turned.
My boyfriend was dying. I was by his bedside when he said something with a weak voice, "There's something I must confess." "Shhh," I said, "There's nothing to confess. Everything is alright." "No, I must die in peace," he said. "I had sex with your sister, your best friend, and your co-worker." "I know,â€ I whispered, "That's why I poisoned youâ€¦ Now close your eyes.â€
Did you hear about McDonald's trying to get into the high-end steakhouse market? It was a Big McSteak.