Potentially the longest thread in history...

[PP Mguire]

Staying at home because you're actively trying to avoid dealing with social situations means you're psychologically under-developed, and has nothing to do with intro/extroversion

edit: to expand slightly, introverts are just as capable of being gregarious, having fun at a party, etc as any other person. They'll just not gain energy from those activities and will need to do other types of activity to gain that energy back.
Not liking a lot of people also has nothing to do with introversion at all, just so happens there's a lot of introverts out there who never practice the things they're bad at and equate their failings with something innate in who they are. A friend of mine basically never comes out to any events whatsoever because he's too anxious every time about meeting new people or going into unknown situations. He says "it's because I'm introverted", as if being introverted means you're automatically sentenced to being bad at social things or you *must* be a quiet/shy person.

Do you even know the definition of introverted? It literally says "a shy, reticent person". That literally explains somebody who would avoid those situations you're specifically talking about. A shy person is not going to willingly want to jump into a situation where they're surrounded by people wanting to socialize. Ever seen the memes about people going to parties only playing with the dog? Exactly that. Most introverted people want to avoid people, and the easiest way to do that is to stay at home where they're comfortable. That's not being psychologically underdeveloped, that's being introverted. Introverts are also usually quiet people, similarly linked to....SHY oh the irony, annnnnd you guessed it RETICENT. All things linked to not wanting to go out and be social. An introverted person is also not likely going to try and engage in conversation to get sexy time going, because they're shy. And yes, being introverted CAN be linked directly to not liking people besides mostly introverts. Why? Because introverts don't typically like outgoing, loud, or obnoxious people. AKA, extroverts. People typically found at parties or social gatherings.

A friend of mine basically never comes out to any events whatsoever because he's too anxious every time about meeting new people or going into unknown situations. He says "it's because I'm introverted", as if being introverted means you're automatically sentenced to being bad at social things or you *must* be a quiet/shy person.

Actually, yes it pretty much does. Considering the fact that introverted has a direct definition of quiet/shy that explains that without any effort. Being anxious and weary of unknown situations is also linked directly to introversion. An introverted person can be nervous/anxious about meeting new people or being in an unknown situation because being shy or awkward can make the situation....awkward. Either that or you just don't say anything because you're shy. This leads to not exactly having a very good time no matter the company. Which is why most introverted people don't want to go out.

Are there certain scenarios where somebody can have the above qualities and still go out to parties and social events? Yes, because most textbook introverts open up around people they're extremely comfortable with. I typically only go out and do things if it's specifically with certain people, otherwise I won't go. Why? Because I'll be too shy to want to do anything unless I'm with those specific people making it pretty much an unbearable event for me. So I'll chose to stay home rather than do anything.

 

[S0ULphIRE]

Yes I do, clearly you don't what you quoted is what people colloquially mean when they use the word. That is *not* the clinical definition, not even close, and you'd have found that out if you'd bothered to read any info on the subject at all from any medical source. When Jung coined the term he was referencing a mental state, of "being turned inward" as in introspection, and had literally nothing to do with being shy or not. That too is considered incorrect in modern psychology now btw, but I am so over wasting my time arguing with you over petty **** that you could easily find out yourself

Today I'm going to check out a house again and (probably) put in an offer fingers crossed.

 

[kmanmx]

Okay but everyone I have ever seen, heard or met has spoken about introversion in the same way PP described it, so the actual oldschool "correct" definition is entirely meaningless when 99% of the population use the word to mean something else.

Even Wikipedia which I am sure you just read directly proves the point.

The trait of extraversion–introversion is a central dimension of human personality theories. The terms introversion and extraversion were popularized by Carl Jung,[1] although both the popular understanding and psychological usage differ from his original intent. Extraversion tends to be manifested in outgoing, talkative, energetic behavior, whereas introversion is manifested in more reserved and solitary behavior.[2]

Also, you are assuming I lack social skills. Nope. I deal with people all day long at my job. I am a great listener, a good communicator, and I can chat comfortably even with people I do not like. I just ****ing hate it, that's all. Listening to a group of people talk doesn't make me nervous, or sick, or give me anxiety. I don't even get anxiety for doing public speaking, I am quite happy with it. But I just happen to loathe it. Listening to a bunch of people at a party showing off or talking consistently, and loudly, all about themselves and this "sick hot chick dude" just drains me so quickly. Within 30 minutes of being at a party I have had all the social interaction I need for the next 2 weeks, and I can't ****ing wait to go home to peace and quiet and just sit their chilled out. I like having friends, but I don't need them much at all, same for family.

Also explains why pretty much all the hobbies I like are solo hobbies that I can do on my own or if I am with other people, don't need to talk much. I don't sit at home doing nothing because it's the best thing I can think to do, I sit at home because it's the best thing that I can reasonably do. If I had infinite money i'd spend my time outside shooting clays (costs almost 50p *per shot* at my local club. You can go through £50 worth of clays and shells in 10 minutes). Or i'd be riding around a track on a superbike or in a sports car, or i'd being skiing in Canada. I can't really do any of those things on a remotely frequent basis.

Staying at home because you're actively trying to avoid dealing with social situations means you're psychologically under-developed, and has nothing to do with intro/extroversion

edit: to expand slightly, introverts are just as capable of being gregarious, having fun at a party, etc as any other person. They'll just not gain energy from those activities and will need to do other types of activity to gain that energy back.
Not liking a lot of people also has nothing to do with introversion at all, just so happens there's a lot of introverts out there who never practice the things they're bad at and equate their failings with something innate in who they are. A friend of mine basically never comes out to any events whatsoever because he's too anxious every time about meeting new people or going into unknown situations. He says "it's because I'm introverted", as if being introverted means you're automatically sentenced to being bad at social things or you *must* be a quiet/shy person.

****ing lol that's the dumbest **** you've ever said on TF (bolded). I'm psychologically under developed because I hate listening to dumb ****ing bull**** that people spew at parties ? you have it completely wrong. Introverted people (lets ignore the fact you dont accept the widely accepted use of the word) just do not need other people to entertain them or make themselves happy. I am not reliant on other people for a good time, I have enough to think about with my own thoughts and engage with my own thoughts and beliefs on things i.e. introspection.

 

[S0ULphIRE]

^? that is so twisted on what I said that I'm just gonna leave it tbh

Ended up putting in an offer on the house, 40k below what they're asking. We'll see lol

 

[kmanmx]

Top kek. Nah you just realized how stupid everything you said was. This would almost be worth linking to /r/iamverysmart

 

[PP Mguire]

Top kek. Nah you just realized how stupid everything you said was. This would almost be worth linking to /r/iamverysmart

This.

 

[PP Mguire]

Yes I do, clearly you don't what you quoted is what people colloquially mean when they use the word. That is *not* the clinical definition, not even close, and you'd have found that out if you'd bothered to read any info on the subject at all from any medical source. When Jung coined the term he was referencing a mental state, of "being turned inward" as in introspection, and had literally nothing to do with being shy or not. That too is considered incorrect in modern psychology now btw, but I am so over wasting my time arguing with you over petty **** that you could easily find out yourself

Today I'm going to check out a house again and (probably) put in an offer fingers crossed.

I guess you forgot that I went to school for psychology and made As in my classes. If I stay with this job they even agreed to pay to go get my masters. Just admit you're not introverted and so you have no realistic knowledge on the subject besides your incorrect interpretation of what you read off the internet.

 

[S0ULphIRE]

if you're saying you stay home/alone because you literally hate other people and can't stand being around them because you think they're all boring/stupid, I'd say that's incredibly narcissistic not just introverted.

As for setting up strawmans and expecting me to argue against them? Yeah nah, I'd prefer not to thanks - I'll leave you to throw all the childish insults you want. As an example, I said "Staying at home because you're actively trying to avoid dealing with social situations means you're psychologically under-developed". You decided to twist that into "oh so I have issues because I hate listening to dumb bull**** at parties". Yeah, that's exactly what I said...not.

All I can say (again) is read any respected/medical source on the subject and the very first thing that 99% of them will cover is how wrong it is to assign the attributes that you are to a personality type as if they're intrinsic to it. It's such a simple ****ing point: being shy is not a prerequisite of being introverted.

For me at least, it was very welcome information as far as my personality went that I could get better at the things I wasn't good at. I'm still the person to the side/corner who isn't saying too much and probably is having a hard time concentrating with so much going on, but am much more functional out than I was 2 or 5 years ago. But extroverted? Pffft

Anyway, I think you're taking it way too personally for some reason, so again I'm just gonna leave it. At the very least, I'm glad you two are finally agreeing over something

 

[Yami]

At the very least, I'm glad you two are finally agreeing over something

I hadn't even noticed, that's amazing.

 

[iFargle]

Holy cow, he's right