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Poizen22
Camera junky
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i just had a really bad break down arguing with my dad.
single once again
- Thread starter Poizen22
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are you alright now?
OP
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Poizen22
Camera junky
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- ottawa ontario canada.
i dont know anymore i rwally dont, all this stress beign sick missing her, havign to pick schools all this all at once, my life is changing to fast for me to handle it.
Nagasama
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you gotta roll with the punches, man. its part of life. you'll be alright!
Ethereal_Dragon
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Sorry to hear about the troubles man.... Also sorry to say, hey, it's part of life... Sure you hear about the high school sweethearts getting hitched and living happily ever after, but seriously, that isn't the norm.
You will learn to adapt to the feelings, and be able to handle it better.
I dunno who broke up with who, or why it happened, but let me tell you this.... I was with a girl for over 4 years. We lived together in an apartment, got pets, then bought a house. Not gonna go into real granular detail, because I don't care.... It's over, we are done. I caught her doing questionable things, and I picked up the phone the next day and told her mom (we were buds) that she had to come home, or find somewhere else to stay, cause I am totally done.
Months later, I went out with another girl who was too young (for me.... legal, but too young & imature for me...), and while I was with her, I still had strong feelings for my ex, so I broke up with the youngin. The ex and I hung out a few times, and EVERY time we would get into an arguement.... we both have come to realize and accept that we bring out the absolute WORST in eachother.
So I stayed single for a while more, and met the most perfect, gorgeous woman. We've been together since July, and things are great. I really have no complaints at all... We have similar family lives, both big into family, our families like eachother, and have actually known each other for MANY MANY years. Her older brother and I grew up together and were best buds.
At any rate man.... my suggestion is this: Carry on with your life. Don't dwell on the past. Don't let past relationships, or relationships at all determine what you do at this point. Go to a college because that is where you want to go, not because you think you'll be able to spend more time with your girl if you go there... You're 18, still an adolescent, and have lots more living to do before you should worry about relationships.... Trust me... I am preachin this, cause I took the other road, and made a HUGE mistake at the age of 20.... No, didn't have a kid, but not gonna go into details.
You will learn to adapt to the feelings, and be able to handle it better.
I dunno who broke up with who, or why it happened, but let me tell you this.... I was with a girl for over 4 years. We lived together in an apartment, got pets, then bought a house. Not gonna go into real granular detail, because I don't care.... It's over, we are done. I caught her doing questionable things, and I picked up the phone the next day and told her mom (we were buds) that she had to come home, or find somewhere else to stay, cause I am totally done.
Months later, I went out with another girl who was too young (for me.... legal, but too young & imature for me...), and while I was with her, I still had strong feelings for my ex, so I broke up with the youngin. The ex and I hung out a few times, and EVERY time we would get into an arguement.... we both have come to realize and accept that we bring out the absolute WORST in eachother.
So I stayed single for a while more, and met the most perfect, gorgeous woman. We've been together since July, and things are great. I really have no complaints at all... We have similar family lives, both big into family, our families like eachother, and have actually known each other for MANY MANY years. Her older brother and I grew up together and were best buds.
At any rate man.... my suggestion is this: Carry on with your life. Don't dwell on the past. Don't let past relationships, or relationships at all determine what you do at this point. Go to a college because that is where you want to go, not because you think you'll be able to spend more time with your girl if you go there... You're 18, still an adolescent, and have lots more living to do before you should worry about relationships.... Trust me... I am preachin this, cause I took the other road, and made a HUGE mistake at the age of 20.... No, didn't have a kid, but not gonna go into details.
OP
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Poizen22
Camera junky
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- ottawa ontario canada.
and shes now officialy going out with the guy the worst part is he is younger then me and her.
Mate it could be worse. I had a girl cheat on me with my best friend at the time. He was seeing her behind my back and they were fooling around while she told me she wanted to wait.
So as bad as things seem, they could be worse.
Things look bad yes. You miss her. That is normal. But you have to get past it. Fill your time with stuff you like to do. Game, mess with your PC, go out with friends. keep busy while you can.
With the holidays coming up it will be tough. The first holiday after a break up is always tough. You think about what you would be doing together at the time, how she would be with you and all that. the main thing is to not dwell on it. Try not to take it out on others like the family.
Yeah it sucks. Yeah it hurts. But the thing is you have to use this to make yourself a better person. You cant change her. You cant change what happened. But what you can do is look at how things went and see how you would react differently to certain situations that you were in that went bad.
Think to yourself, or to someone you trust over the internet via PM or IM, on how you would change some of the things you have done. Talk about it with someone. Someone who has had bad experiences and have used them to make themselves better.
Kraz, myself, Saxon, Trotter, and many others around here will be willing to chat i am sure. That is something to look toward. Talk to them privately and let it out. Give details on things that went bad and find out from a 3rd party on how the situation could have been handled differently.
It sucks. I know. But you will only hurt yourself if you hold it in and take it out on others. You need to find a way to outlet some of the anger and frustation that you have. Send me a PM and go off on me it wont bug me. I understand the situation and wouldnt take offense. IF you just have to let it out on someone then let it be me. Let out the anger. Dont hold it in. The longer you do, the more you are going to hurt yourself and beat yourself up over it and the others around you. cause they will fell your anger via other means. be it a snide remark, a action or something that is done.
Last thing you want to do is use this anger and frustation against those that you still love and care for. I read that you had a bad thing with your dad. Sit him down and tell him. tell him what happened with her. Yeah there might be screaming. Yeah there might be a fight. But in the end it will help.
Being a father, Trotter will agree, that while our child may do things that upset us from time to time we still love them. No matter what. We have to know what is going on in order to be able to help. So tell your dad why you are angry and frustrated. Today may be bad cause it may be a fight. but tomorrow will be better. After the dust settles and you had time to calm down along with your dad you will have a more civilized converstaion and sort things out and work thru it.
If that isnt something you want to do with your dad send me a PM. I will give you my IM addy and we can chat. Just dont continue on this path mate. It will only lead to further angish and make things worse.
While this may be a Tech Forum. Many of us are here and are willing to help out with matter such as this. Use that resource.
So as bad as things seem, they could be worse.
Things look bad yes. You miss her. That is normal. But you have to get past it. Fill your time with stuff you like to do. Game, mess with your PC, go out with friends. keep busy while you can.
With the holidays coming up it will be tough. The first holiday after a break up is always tough. You think about what you would be doing together at the time, how she would be with you and all that. the main thing is to not dwell on it. Try not to take it out on others like the family.
Yeah it sucks. Yeah it hurts. But the thing is you have to use this to make yourself a better person. You cant change her. You cant change what happened. But what you can do is look at how things went and see how you would react differently to certain situations that you were in that went bad.
Think to yourself, or to someone you trust over the internet via PM or IM, on how you would change some of the things you have done. Talk about it with someone. Someone who has had bad experiences and have used them to make themselves better.
Kraz, myself, Saxon, Trotter, and many others around here will be willing to chat i am sure. That is something to look toward. Talk to them privately and let it out. Give details on things that went bad and find out from a 3rd party on how the situation could have been handled differently.
It sucks. I know. But you will only hurt yourself if you hold it in and take it out on others. You need to find a way to outlet some of the anger and frustation that you have. Send me a PM and go off on me it wont bug me. I understand the situation and wouldnt take offense. IF you just have to let it out on someone then let it be me. Let out the anger. Dont hold it in. The longer you do, the more you are going to hurt yourself and beat yourself up over it and the others around you. cause they will fell your anger via other means. be it a snide remark, a action or something that is done.
Last thing you want to do is use this anger and frustation against those that you still love and care for. I read that you had a bad thing with your dad. Sit him down and tell him. tell him what happened with her. Yeah there might be screaming. Yeah there might be a fight. But in the end it will help.
Being a father, Trotter will agree, that while our child may do things that upset us from time to time we still love them. No matter what. We have to know what is going on in order to be able to help. So tell your dad why you are angry and frustrated. Today may be bad cause it may be a fight. but tomorrow will be better. After the dust settles and you had time to calm down along with your dad you will have a more civilized converstaion and sort things out and work thru it.
If that isnt something you want to do with your dad send me a PM. I will give you my IM addy and we can chat. Just dont continue on this path mate. It will only lead to further angish and make things worse.
While this may be a Tech Forum. Many of us are here and are willing to help out with matter such as this. Use that resource.
OP
OP
Poizen22
Camera junky
- Messages
- 6,283
- Location
- ottawa ontario canada.
the thin ig i know i can go on with out forgetting her and ists what i really wqant to do but i know if i dont forget her il keep hurting myself like this emotionaly
I'm going to say this but im not followin it ...
SOmetimes in order to gain happiness you have to go through some pain, which in your case is of lettin go.
You will never move on and forget her completely especially since she'es your first.
But you can keep your self busy and this will help you make the memories of her fade away...and it will minimize...it will be in the back of your head, but it won't be able to bother up to a point where it can break you down.
You might get sad a little...miss her...but as time goes back...it will fade away.
Times a big healer.
In fact, by her being with someone, it should help faster...
there are many stages you'll go through.
Anger, hatred, confusion, pity,....once you can accept what has happened...you will be able to forgive and move on with a more clear path
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