Opinions on my Resume

[sunsider]

- When citing your career plans on your resume itself, keep it to one paragraph. Alternatively, compose an well thought out cover letter which dictates your interesets, and a bold statement about your ability to be what that company needs I love when I read a cover letter and theperson is forward enough to say something like"With my experience and enthusiasm I know I am the right candidate for the job."
- remove the forums link, they won't care. Applications have hit my desk with such information. Makes no impact whatsoever.
- check for spelling mistakes
- "which I believe is the second best ever for this city" - you should post a fact, not a belief, back up your claims.
- "Highly educated in the area of electronics and audio" provide details as to which areas you are educated in, provide educational backups to that statement
- list references & contacts, especially if you worked at a University, Professors are suprisingly helpful in this area.
- "Helping in activities like the Walk For Kids and many other's " what are the many others? Be more specific. Possible employers love volunteers, especially when they know which activity you volunteer for, it shows something about your character and personal traits. Both are positive influences in landing a job.
- replace "flying and flight" with aviation.

Also, I realise this is just a rough layout and it will most likely change many times, but you should clean it up a little, use pertinent categories and bullets for point form data to give a more clean look and overall more functional appearance to your resume. If you wish, I can later post up an example of a person who gave me his resume, whom I hired the same day, not only due to his experience and ability, but for how he laid out his resume to me.

Good luck.

 

[DJ-CHRIS]

Okay I am goign to take some of those suggestions

Still not sure if I will have 1 or 2 paragraph's for job objective

 

[Harper]

This resume will go to a computer store

Right-O
Make sure you beef up your computer section skills then on your resume then as that is what the employer is going to be interested in seeing the most.

However, do not over exagerate or lie your computer skills as I have caught out plenty of people that put things down like Administering Windows 2003 SBS, and yet they have no idea what some of the simplest terms are.

And if they don't catch you out in the interview, they will catch you out in the work place.

Still not sure if I will have 1 or 2 paragraph's for job objective

If this is one of those YOUR-FIRST-COMPUTER-JOB type of jobs, then I woundn't worry about one of them.

Personally, I find those things are a waste of page space unless you are going for some managieral role.

 

[Harper]

i am going through you revised resume once again. It still need some more work.

Excuse me if I sound blunt. I am only posting what would be going through my mind if this showed up on my desk and as an recruiter at my company. So don't take this post as a personal attack on you at all.

Firstly, try to avoid using paragraphs. It's best to list what you have to offer as they do not have to time to wade though text.

CAREER OBJECTIVE

Why do you leave this in? Like I managed to get where I am now, and the only time you need to put in a career objective is when you are trying to go for some managieral position. Especially when it's in the same company.

[EDIT] Ignor what I sead there. I did not realise that americans do this a lot as a standard thing on their resumes. [/EDIT]

I plan on majoring in computer technologies, in order to seek employment in the computer industry.

Ditched the "in order to seek employment in the computer industry part." Of course you are trying to get a employment in the computer industry.

I am also considering a career in professional audio equipment.

Employeers don't care for what you are considering. They care for what you actaully doing, or have done. Unless the job you are going for involved both computer and audio equipment, I would leave this line out all together.
Otherwise, I would in be re-word it so is sound like you are doing some thing about professional audio equipment, and not thinking about it.

I will be attending a college or university, quite possibly by first attending a local college, such as Mohawk College. I am also weighing the option of joining the Canadian Army Reserves either before or after I finish my education.

What are you doing again? This sound like you are a little lost on what your goals are. If you still insist on having the CAREER OBJECTIVE thingy, then i would suggest re-word it so it sounds like you have definate plan on what you are planning to do with yourself for the next 2 years of your life. Like keep down to one thing.

I will be attending a college or university, quite possibly by first attending a local college, such as Mohawk College.

Put it down at I have plans to further my studies of (BLAH) at Mohawk College.

SKILLS
-Very knowledgeable in the field of computers. I am currently studying Upgrading and Repairing PC's (16th edition) . I am also a frequent contributor on www.techist.com, an online community of computer enthusiasts and discussion forums.
-Used to all Windows operating systems including XP, ME, 2000 and 98.
-Build my own computers and know a lot about hardware and how it works.
-I know HTML fluently and I am currently learning C++.
-Fammilar with common programs like Microsoft Office, Openoffice and other buisness applicatiions.
-Very adapt in making good impressions. I earned over $1000 tagging with Air Cadets which I believe is the second best ever for this city.
-Highly educated in the area of electronics and audio.
-Very punctual, honest, reliable and good with people.
-I build my own computers and I have 4 in my house and are used to fixing all of their problems.

You might want to just put a seperate section just for your computer skills.
Some thing like :-
COMPUTER SKILLS :-
- Building, Upgrading and Repairing computer hardware
- Trouble Shooting Computers
- Virus / AdWare / Spyware Removal.
- Webpage Buidling with HTML,
etc. etc.

If you use a computer program for DJ, list it down.

EDUCATION
-Currently in Westmount Secondary School. I am currently in the process of completing Grade 11.
-My largest interest in school is anything involving computers and electronics.
-Completed and Passed Ground School training with Air Cadets which is needed to start flying.
-Completed ITAC (Introduction To Aviation Course) and Basic Training at summer camps with the Air Cadets.

You might want to list what acheivements that you have down in school

-My largest interest in school is anything involving computers and electronics.

Expand on that. Where you part of a computer club, or where you with the teachers on the computer commitee. You might want list those thing that you did at school that involved computers and electronics.

WORK & VOULNTEER EXPERINCE

How about the words "Employment History". Like the employeer is not going to care if you got paid with those jobs or not.

Part Time Worker. McMaster University. 3-4 Months
-Worked for Department of Medicine.

Again, what did you do down there. You might want to list your duties. And you might want to list end you started and finished this job.

3-4 Months

How many months where you there for? 3 months? 4 months? 10 weeks? Make it sound like you are sure of yourself on what you were doing in the past.

Hamilton International Air show Many years
-Did assorted work and handled a lot of the radio communication for the airshow.

If you can not remember how long you have been doing a volenteer work down at the air show, just make a rough guess at leave it at that.

EXPERIENCES AND ACHIEVEMENTS

List these chronologically with a year on when you acheived them.

INTRESTS AND HOBBIES
Besides having Computers and Gaming a Hobbies and interest, I have a few more. I have been a computer gamer playing CS, HL Mods, Americas Army, CoD, CS:S \ HL2M as well as a few other games for many years. I enjoy music and I am a DJ. In the summer I enjoy riding bikes as well. Flying and flight have also been a big interest of mine.

It best only list the interests and hobbies that will benifit the job that you are going to. If you want to put down your hobbies that really don't befit the job, then put down "Enjoyies playing computer games" as appose to to listing all the games you are doing to.

With your DJing, have you done any gigs? You might want to list them own in your acheivements.

Anyways, I hope this helps. I did not mean to grill you to hard.

Good Luck and get yourself that job!!!