Work ****ters

[Omoplata]

Are you a work ****ter? What do I mean by work ****ter? I mean someone that decides that every day they are going to take themselves a nice little 10-15 minute break and go drop some friends off at the pool. You know what I mean, right? Have a brown baby boy, pinch a loaf, go see a man about a dog etc. I cannot, for the life of me, wrap my head around this. Why would you choose to do your business in a disgusting public bathroom on a daily basis? I can understand emergencies and such, but EVERY day? Really?

Here is my dilemma. I drink A LOT of water and due to that need to use the head often. Probably 50% of the time I do there is some mouth breather in the stall, door closed, emanating a foul odor and making random grunting sounds. It drives me crazy. Most of the time I try to do an about face and hightail it out of there, but sometimes I get too far in and feel pot committed (no pun intended). A lot of the times I do get out of there in time and go to the other bathroom on my floor, there is a SECOND turd merchant in the other bathroom!! Arggggghh!! I want to shoot myself when that happens.

So back to the question. Are you a work ****ter? Is there a secret work ****ter society? Because it certainly seems to be the case where I work. It is like they have a daily schedule and try to keep someone's cheeks to the seat for every minute of the day with little to no courtesy flushing.

Please discuss.

 

[PP Mguire]

Because people like to get paid to have an excuse to literally sit on their ass. As they say, *******s rule the world, and when you gotta go, you gotta go. My bosses never argued if I straight up told them, gotta ****, BBL.

 

[borstarhymes]

i love pooping at work

 

[Omoplata]

i love pooping at work

This is hardly surprising lol

 

[Yevrag35]

I take a little break, play a quick game of cribbage on my phone, then I'm done. Not everyday though, mind you.

 

[Omoplata]

Because people like to get paid to have an excuse to literally sit on their ass. As they say, *******s rule the world, and when you gotta go, you gotta go. My bosses never argued if I straight up told them, gotta ****, BBL.

Hahaha Yeah I guess what are they going to say?

 

[xIx EDGE xIx]

There's a "hidden" bathroom on the second floor in the old part of the courthouse (I say hidden because it's off the beaten path and no courtrooms are being occupied in that corridor at the moment, so no one ever ventures that way)

Anyway, there's a guy that I work with that calls that his second office. It's more or less an excuse to just get away for about 15 minutes or so to just relax and chill out. Can't really blame the guy either because there's a lot of micromanagment in this place. It almost reminds me of the beginning of Office Space where like eight different supervisors ask Peter if he got the memo about the new TPS reports.

 

[PP Mguire]

Hahaha Yeah I guess what are they going to say?

My boss at the gas station tried telling me I couldn't **** when I was working alone. Since I pretty much ran the store by myself 90% of the time it's impossible not to need to go. I cleaned the bathroom myself, so I had no troubles using what I considered "my own". If that makes sense. I rang up the regional manager and said, pardon my French ma'am, but what if I'm by myself and need to squat? She said, lock the store doors, put up a sign, and go do your business. It's in the handbook, but I'm guessing your manager says otherwise. Boom, instant 20 minute break every day. At that place, we worked 8-10 hour shifts and didn't get any real break so it was nice to have a 20 minute sit after I got real permission. Especially on holidays where customers would rape that place.

 

[Omoplata]

I had a friend that did this every day. It was a point of contention between us for a long time. Still, he had the best bathroom stories. For example, one random day we were at work and I was wearing dark green pants and brown shoes. He trotted off to the bathroom came back like 20 minutes later and looks at me all weird. I looked at him and said "What?" He goes "You have brown shoes on!!" He was clearly embarrassed. He then tells me that he was dropping a brown bomb and someone with green pants and black shoes came in and sat in the stall next to him. After some paper crinkling and fidgeting the person let out a massive fart. My friend, thinking it was me, said "You are one smelly mother ****er!!" Then there was awkward silence for the next 5 minutes he was in there. I was dying laughing at him.

 

[Omoplata]

My boss at the gas station tried telling me I couldn't **** when I was working alone. Since I pretty much ran the store by myself 90% of the time it's impossible not to need to go. I cleaned the bathroom myself, so I had no troubles using what I considered "my own". If that makes sense. I rang up the regional manager and said, pardon my French ma'am, but what if I'm by myself and need to squat? She said, lock the store doors, put up a sign, and go do your business. It's in the handbook, but I'm guessing your manager says otherwise. Boom, instant 20 minute break every day. At that place, we worked 8-10 hour shifts and didn't get any real break so it was nice to have a 20 minute sit after I got real permission. Especially on holidays where customers would rape that place.

LOL PP are you the head of a union??