Now this is the religion all about how,
Hubbard's wallet got flipped turned upside down. So hook up an E-meter and sit right there I'll tell you how you became a human Preclear.
On the planet Coltice born and raised Mining Vespene gas is how I spent most of my days, Being overpopulated and relaxin' all cool and all playing some Thetan ball outside Scientology school. When a couple of Psychiatrists who were up to no good, started freezing brothers in my neighborhood, I got in one little volcano and my Overlord Got scared and said "your moving with the homospaiens on Teegeeak, that planet with air"
So I Whistled for a DC8 and when it came near, It had no propellers just rockets in the rear If anything I could say the in-flight brainwashing movie was rare but I thought "nah forget it, Then they put me in a box using some Ghostbusters gear"
I pulled up to the planet about 7 or 8 million years ago And yelled to Xenu "Yo ho, Imprison you later" I looked at my Thetans, we were finally there To haunt us some primates with little body hair.
â€”Will Smith suspected $cientologist