Notice from Draygoes:

[~mr mixx~]

Draygoes I am so sorry to hear that she has passed my brother. I know it can be very hard for you. I lost my Dad 2 years ago and i think about him all the time.

I do have to say he was blessed to be able to live to be 93. Take as much time as you need my friend, we'll be here for you.

 

[Draygoes]

Thank you all for your understanding. I have got to get back to life now, as there are things that need to be done. You guys are the best.
A bit of an update; There is a chance that the cremation will happen. Every part of the family (Including extended) have chipped in. The most difficult choice was between resources for living, and resources for her. The decision is almost final, and we have gotten a place that will do it very kindly for the cheapest we have seen yet. Please keep in mind that I would give everything to give my mother what she wanted, but what she wanted simply cannot happen.

We have no date for the funerial, but what we do have is that she wished to be cremated and her ashes put in the gas tank of a Harley Davidson. It was her favorite type motorcycle, despite the fact that she only got to ride one once. The last part may not be possible, but we are trying. My aunt may have found someone who I think will give it away.

As for the funeral, it will most likely be held at my grandmothers old home. My grandmother passed away in that house, it was left to us, and... well long story short we gave it to my aunt. But, I doubt she would care where it is held.

In any case, life goes on and so do I. So for that, I will say that I am going to be a lot more active from now on.

Thank you all again for your support, and I give you my word that I will be more active at least until the funeral part... I do not wish to think about that right now.




P.s. I have followed the advice of several members of this forum (You know who you are, and thank you!), and it helped supprisingly well. I was taught in self defense that to defeat your opponent, you must first defeat yourself. That includes emotions. This proved to be impossible in this case. So, I followed the advice given through PM, and it worked. I just hope that it continues to work.

 

[Celery]

Bottling up your emotions is not healthy so let it rip, it will be understood and no shame in that.

When my mom died in 98 I donated her body to health science (her wish) and we held a memorial at my sis's church.

 

[Draygoes]

Bottling up your emotions is not healthy so let it rip, it will be understood and no shame in that.

My teacher probably would have said the same thing. (That reminds me, I need to call him sometime. Its been a while, but we became pretty close.)

The defeating yourself part was ment to mean that you defeat your emotions while fighting. Utilize adrillian, and do not get angry. Anger can cause you to get hurt, or go to far against the opponent. I do not think that he had any intentions for that advice to be used in these types of situations.

That being said, it took Cynthia for me to learn that being soft can be a good thing outside of a fight situation. I learned that while being with her, but it was initially to be soft with her. Now I am using what she taught me outside of a fight situation. (I refuse to use the word Combat, as true combat is fighting for your life. At least, that is the way I view it.)

I have the recording of the last time I saw her alive located in several places. HD, FD, Memory Card, and Google Drive. I can share if anyone wants to see it. Its not the best quality (Despite the device recording in high def...) but that will give you guys an idea of who all was there, and what we where doing. There is no crying, but that is because we expected a few weeks at least. She passed away 2 days after the recording.
I would post it here anyway, but the reason that I am asking is because the recording is in HD, and therefore weighs a lot. Around 400MB if I am not mestaken. I just do not wish for anyone to be caught off guard.
Oh, and because I am a dumb a**, I recorded it upside down. Anyone wishing to view it would have to use VLC or a program like that which can correct my mestake. In VLC it is automatic, but I am not sure about other players...

Got off on a tangent for a sec, sorry. I have some great news. A Chaplin that was a good friend of my mothers decided that he would finish covering the cost where we could not. I just talked to him about 10 mins ago.