Ok, I'm bored, so I figured I'd start a joke thread like I have participated in on some other forums. Heres some funny stuff I read:
Life's Little Questions
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out?"
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about
him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but
don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if he or
she is going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion
stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet
paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from
morons?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere,
but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in -- well, you get the idea.
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad
at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the
window?
Anyone else have any good jokes?
Life's Little Questions
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out?"
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about
him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but
don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if he or
she is going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion
stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet
paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from
morons?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere,
but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in -- well, you get the idea.
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad
at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the
window?
Anyone else have any good jokes?
