Count Chocola is condemning you!

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gaara

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I saw this a while ago and just stumbled across it more recently, it's a list published from St. Mary's Catholic Church that tells parents how to find out if their kids have fallen into the hands of satan. :p

Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick, or nailpolish.

-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-chr*st, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation.
This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism,
Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.
 

PP Mguire

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yea, i was like almost all of that in 8th grade yet i used to be a christian. hmm funny. im not religious anymore though. then again i can also tell you how almost all of those have nothing to do w/ satan or the "lord". damn i hate hippocrits.:rolleyes:
 

Nubius

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lol yeah...according to that list we're all "goth"

"-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Drinks alcohol. (occasionally :p)

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

-Complains of boredom.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this. (LOL Count dracula cereal....what morons)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates (just about every guy on earth is condemned to hell then hahaha)"


lol those all pretty much apply to me...and the thing says 5 or more.....hahahaha, I"M GOTH OOoOOOOooOo and look at my Avatar, it's an upside down star (which could be considered a pentagram) WITH A SKULL INSIDE IT!! OMG OMG OMG

'Shows interest in sex", jesus.....man these kinds of people are screwed up themselves.

EDIT: Just actually counted the ones I posted....total of 14 lol.....over 5 and you're condemned!
 

PP Mguire

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yea exactly why i said its a bunch of bullshit. everybody has to at least (well not everybody but most everybody) have sex ounce and pop out a kid cause its how we live. damn ****ing idiots these days, i say they are hippocrits and all the religions on this world are currupt. (no offense to any religious ppl on this forum intended)
 

YourPrinter

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-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

LOL, so they're saying we shouldn't procreate? LOL GOD wants the human race to die out.

Wow, I fall under over 5 of those categories...

And I'm 100% sure I don't participate in Satanic religions.
 

Powerslave

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THAT'S THE BIGGETS LOAD OF SH*T EVER! ROFL I guess im not christian anymore, but a GOTH!. I guess my Iron Maiden T-shirts have made me SATANIC OH NO!!!
on the masturbating thing, i mean, you gotta practice sometimes. Jeesh.
 
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