dx9 is like an update package
your hardware does not need to be dx9 to function with it, you just won't beneift greatly if your hardware is an older gen card.
Dx5, that's far back from DX9. Not sure why such a disparity.
Hardware wise, you don't REQUIRE a package like what your wife purchased. Such things make it easier for non technical computer users.
There are numerous ways to IMPORT video to the pc and that may have been your only option, but of course, I am not sure. You are able better to determine that.
Video can be tranferred to your personal computer by way of:
cd/dvd/flash to pc...depending of course
cam corder to vcr to video card...all depending...etc
VHS tape to video transfer service, ala booths in department stores/malls...photo labs and even places like kinkos
It's a big confusing world out there huh...but that's the beauty of DX...tries to make it less confusing