GOOD NEWS!
It's finally working. Now here's the sad part: I ran Windows Update and it correctly identified the hardware and installed the driver and it's a VIA!
It installed the "Vinyl AC'97 Codec Combo Driver" and all is well.
After a good full day of fighting it, that windows startup sound was truly "music to my ears".
Thanks to you who helped even though we were chasing the wrong chipset all along.