weak smokinAI, yer killin our tight thread. I find the blow-up beaver doll to be quite likely. its not alive, its not electronic, the interchangable orifices, patch kit (when ya get rough), and tail that comes off for easy access could fit in an orange box (odd unit of measurement btw), and you would never have thought of it! it fits all the criteria, whether you would use it is up to you crazy kids!
. What a surprise on Christmas morning!