House Mate Horror Stories

[PP Mguire]

ROFLMAO!!! heres one when me and a friend stayed the night over at a friends house. Ok the victim and owner of the house (shane) wanted to take a shower so we where like oh ok have fun. So me and my other friend josh get a great idea. lets take all of his clothes and towels and wash clothes and anything that he can cover up w/ and threw it outside of his bathroom outside of reach lol. well when he was done we heard alot of scampering (casue we where listening) and then alot of cussing lol. Well after that he yells out the bathroom "hey that shits not funny!! give me something so i can get some underwear!!" so what we do? through him an xbox magazine!! we figured he woudl say **** it and just come out naked (which would have been a scary sight) but nstead he comes jumping out of the bathroom saying "here comes Xbox magazine!!" he walks out and he has his croch covered and thats it lol lol. he then looks down and says "poor hitman" it was the funnyest shit EVER!! also when he fell asleep i ass faced him and got a few pictures of it lol.

 

[Harper]

This week's Episode of Housemate Stupidity

This week's Episode of Housemate Stupidity is the following :-

House Mate G has this freind in from Japan. She's hanging around for a few months. And after 1 week, I would like to pack her up and FedEx her home.

We got the following rule in the kitchen. You use it, You Clean It. I even purchased a dish washer just to make this job easier.

She comes in. Coment about the place is a bit untidy. We clean up. And then she proceeds to make a bigger mess instead.

And then she has the nerve to give me lip when I ask her clean up the plates that she was using.

So sunday morning, I threw up her dinner out from the night before as it was left in the pot on the stove.
She comes in telling me off about it.

Me :- Look woman, firstly you don't pay rent or bill here. You come here, and comment about the place is messy. We clean up. And then you make a bigger mess. You know the rules with the kitchen. And if don't like it, the doors that way.

She not talking with me right now.
However she's pissed off Housemate G, but pussywipped Housemate S. So she's still hanging around.

 

[PP Mguire]

he gettin the pussy though? casue if not then hes just whipped.

 

[Harper]

he gettin the pussy though? casue if not then hes just whipped.

I will be jellious if he's getting both.
The bad thing about Housemate S is that he does have a GF is sort of getting the hint of this. The problem is that he's been leading this Japanese Girl on. And since he does not have the balls to tell this Japanese Girl otherwise, the Japanese Girl got the hots of him. And she's have not plans on moving out regardless the number of times I just behave like a jerk to her.
- listening to my stereo at full blair when she's home.
- Call her "WOMAN!"
- Walking around in nothing more that boxers and a bathrobe
- Leaving a copy of the book "The Seductive Art Of Japanese Bondage" right on my coffee table in my living room.

 

[Static_11]

ROTFLMAO HOLY CRAP THAT IS FREEEEEEEAKKKKKKKKKINNNG AWESOME.....

 

[Dark_Sniper*]

i have got to tell you im still with my mom living as i am in high school so. But i went over my friends place one time and it was a long as weekend so we had a party. With girls and guys well this one guy spill's some coke on my friends new Computer. and said to him "Dude im sorry i didnt meean to but it was funny as hell the direr was cool" when i heard taht i was laugh so hard my friend was like you son of a ***** im going to kill you for that. MY friend kicked that guys ass and the party went on. When school came the guy had a broken nose from me had to get 1 hit and a few broken ribs from my friends and still to this day. Say that fire was SO COOL what a dumass. And my friends still telle him so you liked that Asskicking too.

 

[Harper]

ROTFLMAO HOLY CRAP THAT IS FREEEEEEEAKKKKKKKKKINNNG AWESOME.....

I am normally not like this.

- listening to my stereo at full blair when she's home.

I normally wait until I know I am the only person at home before I do this. Some people just wait to be alone in the house so they can watch pr0n. However me, I just wait until I am the only person in the house so I can let me stereo rip with some Thumping Techno or some old school N.I.N.

- Call her "WOMAN!"

Gundam W inspired me to do this. I find this rude (even by my standards)

- Walking around in nothing more that boxers and a bathrobe

I only do this when I going to and from my bed room when I just want to get a drink or go to the bath room in at night.

- Leaving a copy of the book "The Seductive Art Of Japanese Bondage" right on my coffee table in my living room.

A rather infomative read. Why didn't I learn this sort of rope work back in scouts.

 

[Static_11]

ok... i JUST relized i had caps lock on that.....

 

[DJ-CHRIS]

What if we want people to leave to do both?

 

[Harper]

What if we want people to leave to do both?

What both of what?



LAST NIGHT EPISODE OF STUDITY
I get home. Once again, I find that the front curtains have been left open. Which means that any one can see my house mate prov-arse DVD, VHS, LD Player and Stereo System.
But to make matter's worse, I found that my back door was open too. The back door lead is just around the corner from my $10000 work on Home Cinema Set Up.
And the make things worse, you can see the back door clearly from the front window.

Me :- Who was the last person to leave?
Japanese Girl :- Me
Me :- When.
Japanese Girl :- Umm this morning.
Me :- So you left this house, not only did you not close he front curtains, but you left the back door open too.
Japanese Girl :- But I did not open the back door.
Me :- THAT NOT THE F***ING POINT! You are suppose to lock up before leaving the house. We could of had some one walk in and walk out. Why not just leave my stuff in the middle of the front lawn next time.

Later on that night, I have the HouseMate G and HouseMate S going around singing the Sesame Street and Play School themes.
Urge to kill is rising.


It's only another 10 more days before my folks get back from holiday.