Whats wrong with being a geek? As i see it, we have an advantage over the rest of the world.
I'm afraid to play america's army.. Next then you know i'll be brainwashed and joining the marines.
You're expecting too much out of the radeon card. Nvidia has surpassed ati chipsets in speed as of recent. If you have your settings to max performance (no AA, no VS, etc) and have your card set to render like 300 frames ahead (im not sure if catylst has this option). Other than that, make sure you have enough power to your system. If it still doesnt work, go buy a 6600gt.
EDIT: also, the stereotypical geek isnt at all what a geek truly is. Also, VIA truly does suck.